Retirement

When Eldon retired the first time, everyone gathered round, cheered for him, drank to his health, and offered their best wishes.

When Eldon retired the second time, everyone gathered round, a little uncertain; they drank to his health, gave him a fancy watch, and joked about this one really going to take.

When Eldon retired the third time, a smaller crowd gathered, drinking to his health and making jokes about how the third time would be a charm, and hadn’t he gotten enough of their goodwill already?

Eldon was unable to retire a fourth time, as he was laid off during the company’s downsizing. Everyone was surprised when their pension fund collapsed, though Eldon had been warning about the difficulties in accessing the funds for years.

Eldon got a new job at a fast food restaurant, and hated the last few years of his life, but at least he was alive.

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