Jurassic Phobias

Immediately following his first viewing of Jurassic Park, Sandy had developed a phobia of sitting on the toilet.

His parents, initially against his watching the movie, and finally capitulated only to have their worries verified. Sandy came home from the movie in good spirits, talking about how cool the dinosaurs were. But when he went to the bathroom the next day, they were sent running toward him by the sound of his screams.

While he got over the screaming, he was forever uncomfortable with sitting on the toilet. Sandy’s parents invested in a squat toilet, imported from South Korea. Sandy’s fears were allayed, though visitors to the home were often confused.

In adulthood, Sandy’s phobia reared its head again. When he moved out to an apartment, he found the landlord particularly unwilling to allow any modifications to the bathroom, even though Sandy offered to pay for it himself. As a result, Sandy rigged a squatting system around the standard toilet. It helped, but for a year he was never comfortable, and took trips home whenever possible.

The day Sandy adopted a dog, though, was the day he undid many years of therapy.

Like many bachelors, Sandy rarely closed the door when in the bathroom. On the second day with the dog, as he squatted over the toilet, hoping for little to no splash back, his new companion poked his head into the room. Sandy yelped. The dog backed out and ran to another room in fear. Sandy slipped, pulling his pants up, visions of Tyrannosaurs and Velociraptors in his mind.

As he lay on the floor in a fetal position, his pants around his knees, the dog poked his head back in. He walked cautiously over to Sandy, and started licking his face. Sandy, whimpering, could do nothing but accept this bath, and he slowly relaxed.

As his mind came to terms with the comfort being offered, Sandy eased himself up to a seated position. He pulled his pants the rest of the way up, and rubbed his dog’s head. “Thanks buddy,” he said.

The next day, as Sandy prepared himself for his daily defecation, he opened the door. The dog trotted in, and Sandy felt at ease. No worries of being eaten, no fears of dinosaurs, prevented him from finishing his daily requirements.


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