Letter Writing

As a letter writer, Andy was top-notch. As an ideas person, he was sub-par.

He began his letter-writing campaign to the government in February, with the announcement of a new program wherein the government would listen more closely to hand-written letters than to online petitions. Andy promptly sat and wrote a lengthy polemic on the evils of public education, arguing that schools should be converted to factories. He was eloquent, concise, and logical in his eccentric diatribe.

The next month, with the announcement of improvements to the public health system, Andy wrote another letter arguing that the new factory-schools could be staffed by children, working as pharmaceutical manufacturers and research subjects.

April brought a statement from the government regarding a recent recession, for which Andy wrote a letter suggesting the selling of the work of the unpaid child-interns at the factory-schools internationally, or perhaps the selling of the interns themselves. They could, he argued, even be rented out to businesses in need of low-wage employees, from which the government could collect a tidy sum.

By May, the government decided to end its letter-writing acceptance campaign, having accomplished all it needed. It then announced a conversion of the public schools to factories, with further developments to be announced.


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