Cold Calling

“Mmmmmmyellow?”

“Hello, is this Mr. Stephen Parkdale?”

“Mmmyes, it is.”

“Hi Mr. Parkdale, my name is Alan, I’m with credit counseling services, I – ”

“Uh huh, and how can I help you?”

“Well, Mr. Parkdale, there’s nothing wrong with your credit, I just – ”

“I know there isn’t. I’ve worked very hard to keep it that way.”

“Right, we just wanted to offer you a lower interest rate on your credit card today.”

“Oh, and why are you doing that?”

“I’m sorry?”

“Why would you offer me that?”

“Well sir, you’re a valued customer, so we want to make sure you’re happy.”

“I’m quite happy with my current credit card, thank you. How do you think I got to have such a good credit score?”

“I don’t actually know your credit score Mr. Parkdale, I was – ”

“But you said there was nothing wrong with my score. Did you say that without actually knowing?”

“Um, well, I suppose so, sir.”

“And you want to sell me a product by lying to me?”

“Not lying sir, it – ”

“I am shocked and appalled at such behaviour, especially from a reputable company such as yours that would call people to offer them lower interest rates. You’ll be receiving a poor rating with the Better Business Bureau, and potential litigation for misrepresentation of your services.”

“Sir, I’m not – ”

“That’s all, unless you’d like to learn how to better market yourself and increase your sales by thirty percent.”

“I’m sorry?”

“I’d be happy to offer you our deluxe marketing package at a reduced rate, as it sounds like you could use it.

“Well, I…I mean…yes, I guess so, sir.”

“Wonderful, can I have your credit card information, Alan?”

“Certainly, sir, just a moment.”

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